In a podcast interview, economist Tyler Cowen asks music producer Rick Rubin what we can all do to become better listeners. Rubin answers:
Start…[to] understand what the other person is saying.
Most of us, when listening, are formulating an opinion, either in response—what are we going to say in response? What do I think about this? Or looking for something to disagree with, or a piece to latch onto.
We take a little piece and then tune out from what’s being said. Any ability to turn our own filters off, forget about what we think, not be analytical at all, and only listen with the idea of truly understanding what the person is communicating.
Then ask questions if there’s anything that we don’t completely understand or anything that might be different, anything that seems odd that the person is saying.
I’m not saying challenge them. I’m saying, “Oh, why is that the case? How did you get to that?”
When we truly open ourselves to people, they tell us everything, and we can learn a tremendous amount.